The only thing that drives me mad about a full moon is people saying it affects human behaviour. When you can’t see half the moon it hasn’t disappeared. It exerts the same gravity no matter how much sunlight bounces off it.If you don’t believe me. 7 hours ago
I looked it up. A ‘manwasher’ is a sponge but, er, for men. #cretins16 hours ago
It’s hard to think of anything sadder than someone buying a 1.75L bottle of coke because they thought it contained happiness.2 days ago
"Perfect for stew"4 days ago
Pound shop closing down sale got post-apocalyptic pretty quickly. I only just managed to get out with some basic supplies, clawing the padded A4 envelopes from a topless man overladen with plastic storage boxes. A mother trapped in the queue thrust her baby into my arms and told me to “Go, just go!” I didn’t have time to look back. The last thing I heard were gun shots.5 days ago
My exhibition is today, 6pm till late. Bring your eyeballs and a liver. https://www.facebook.com/events/6276661573106232 weeks ago
My all time favourite drink.
Although with 37.5mg of caffeine I don’t know where the “peace and quiet” comes in.
Advert is more accurate if you reverse the direction of the images.2 weeks ago
Britannia building society made these promotional key rings so you’d be reminded of their threat to repossess your home anytime you opened the door.3 weeks ago